So Tiny

Joshua on CPAP

The Birthday Cake Fun

Look Who's 1!

Yesterday was Joshua's First Birthday! It actually wasn't that great of a day. Joshua was fussy all day and tired (from a long night of playing in his crib) and I took him to his one-year check up where he got his immunizations. Eric thought it was mean to do on his birthday but I figured he can't tell the difference anyway! We're having a party on Saturday so that will be the fun day :)

So I've done lost of reminiscing lately about the day Joshua was born.....
Last year I had been finally admitted to the hospital on bed rest for six days before Joshua was born. I remember the day before was Memorial Day, and my family came to bring me a "BBQ" dinner so we could party in my room. Right when they got there, I had a bleeding episode and started contracting so the nurse had to kick everyone out. The contractions continued all night and they gave me several shots of terbutaline to try and stop them (Which, I have since decided is the WORST MEDICINE ever invented!) It was like IV caffeine to the 100th power. By morning things were quieting down. Eric and I were trying to decide if he should go to work. He had only been there 2 weeks and had already missed a lot of work due to this, and so (against my nurse's advice) we decided he could go for a couple hours and I would try to rest. About an hour after he left, the nurse woke me and had me turn over to my other side, Joshua's heart rate was high. When that didn't help they called my doctor and decided to do an ultrasound to see if they needed to deliver him. I remember being wheeled down the hallway, I was in shock that this was happening. My nurse looked at me and said, "It's okay to cry, this is scary" and I guess that was all I needed to hear because I burst into tears. I called Eric and told him to hurry, and I called my mom too. They decided as soon as I got to the ultrasound room that my abruption was worsening and we had to get the baby out. I was already extremely scared to have a c-section, (even though I had seen hundreds..maybe that didn't help). When they put in the epidural I remember the nurse pressed her forehead against mine and held me. But the worst was yet to come.

So because this was "emergency" surgery, everything up to this point happened in about 20 minutes. They laid me back and started cutting before I was all the way numb. I felt the first incision (not totally or I would have run out of the room probably) but it burned and I knew what they were doing. Eric was holding my hand and I started crying saying, "Stop, it hurts! It hurts!" Finally they put me to sleep. When I woke up they were taking me back to my room. I was in SO much pain I couldn't believe it. After several doses of morphine my doctor determined that the epidural hadn't worked properly, (it's supposed to deliver pain medicine to keep you somewhat numb for 12 hours after) and that's why everything was so bad. The next 18 hours were horribly painful.

When I finally saw Joshua for the first time at 6 pm that night I realized it was all worth it. The nerve-wracking pregnancy, the hospital food, the meltdowns, the constant worry, 42 days in the NICU, trips to the ER, Joshua's hernia surgery, the up-all-nights, the sore... EVERYTHING, the pumping every 3-4 hours for 7 months, dealing with non-stop laundry from/poop/pee/reflux, watching my body become "mom-ified" and retaining water for 4 months after the surgery.

We are so thankful for all we have overcome this last year, all to have a beautiful healthy and happy little boy, it was all worth it. And I would do it all again in a heartbeat. (And, as Eric pointed out, I probably will with the next one!)

Anyway, we had some birthday cake last night and of course had to document that.

After he finished eating, I hurried up and stuck him in the tub. He was so covered with cake I didn't want to get it on my clothes so I had the bright idea to just stick him in the water-filled tub and then take off his diaper. Which would have been fine...if there wasn't poop in the diaper... I'll let you imagine the details but let's just say I ended up hosing him off in the shower for quite some time. :S

The Perpetual Teether

So when I heard about teething babies, for some reason I just thought it was a brief experience, hard for a little bit but then it was over........ and I've had yet another humbling realization since then. Joshua has been teething since December and right now he's getting 3 at once! It looks like he will have 8 teeth by the time he's 1...and that's after being 2 1/2 months early jeez! So my first mother's day was wonderful. I got Belgian waffles for breakfast and flowers and lots of love from my little family! It's hard to believe I've been a mother for just one short year. It's completely life changing and mind-consuming and the memories of life (when it was easy:) ) before parenthood feel so long ago.

Here are some fun pictures. I have to confess to the Wingers...I saw the pictures of your boys naked and it was so cute I had to copy you and take some of Joshua. I usually don't let him crawl around without a diaper and he absolutely LOVED it!! Thanks for the cute idea :)

Did anyone else celebrate like we did when Adam Lambert was in the bottom 3 on American Idol this week??? It's so annoying the way the judges slobber over him... personally I think he's kinda freaky!
So after everything we dealt with when Joshua had a cold in February, needless to say this whole Swine Flu has us a little nervous. It's hard to know how bad it will get, but cases are showing up in our county and 5 schools are closed this morning. Last night we made a big trip to the grocery store to stock up on things so we wouldn't have to go for a while. While we were on our way out this kid walked past us and coughed loudly (without even covering his mouth) right next to Joshua in his stroller. I just about smacked him! So there's my vent and now here's some fun pictures of Joshua :)